Today my day was quite fun, although lesson was supposed to be boring, I managed to make it more interesting...
Afternoon, during break, I went to the near by hawker centre with my good friend yu qiang...earlier on I asked my other close friends wheater they wish follow us or not, but they said that they prefer to have a lunch at sch canteen considering it to be cheaper..
I was a lil pissed off due to the absence of a 100% halal food stall in that hawker centre, so I have no choise but to puchase a portion of chinese chicken noodle which I believed to be halal after series of investigations. Mhh... that was the first time i tasted a pure chinese food in singapore... quite nice actually... Yu qiang purchased some pork-based dishes, it looked nice honestly but I never thought of ever trying it ... because it contained PORK..!!
Suddenly rain fell... wah... I believe we would be drenched by the time we reach the sch... And yu qiang seemed to be scared of rain.... he told me that he would easily get fever if he had to wear wet shirt for a long period if time.. I was just smiled at him....
"hey, are you gay?" I asked him...
"NOOOO!!", he answered...
"then why do u have to be so scared of drops of rain.... It's just tiny droplets water .... and I am sure that It will not kill you.." ,I responded...
"but... But...", he said..
"come on, lets get over it and reach the sch, lecture will start soon man...".
I pulled him to the exposed area of rains, we then started to ran hastly....
as soon as we reached the sch , I uttered this question...
"hey, how was the 'rain'?"
"haha.... it's fun... ", he replied...
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Agnetha praised me few times . She told me, I am very gentlement and it's very hard to find that kind of guy these day... for that I helped her to bring her stuff voluteerly... honestly, I didnt expect her to say that anyway, I was just trying to help her out as her friend.. hahah...
I was so free that i escorted her to tampenis mrt by bus and then I returned back to tp afterwards for my cca. Looked stupid rite..? But it worthed it... cuz we had a great chat along the way... We were discussing abt lovelife and our own love stories.. I felt very sad when I had to recall the story of my first crushed... LIM QIAN PINK..
I remembered that I did created this poem for her that day after I felt really broken hearted... you know why? I proposed too late... when she had just already had bf...
Biar ku biarkan cintaku pergi..
Biar kubiarkan cintaku pergi
kerana ku tahu kamu sudah ada yang memiliki
tak ingin lagi ku ingkari
kenyataan yang begitu pahit dihati
Amos?
Dia memang pantas buatmu
bukan aku menyerah sebegitu
tapi kerana aku memang tahu
dialah yang berhak mewarnai hidupmu
Aku berjanji..
Aku tak akan cemburu..
tak kan lagi kuberikan beban padamu..
dan aku mengerti..
kehadiranku tidak lagi kau harapkan..
Dan aku kan terus bahagia..
Kerana dapat mengenalmu sebagai sahabatku..
(Translation)
And I should let my love begone..
And I should let my love begone..
because I know that u belong to somebody
And I could not deny any longer
reality that seems bitter to taste..
Amos?
he is perfectly suit for u
is not that i have given up
but I just trully understand
that only he who deserve to paint beautiful colours on canvas of ur live
And I do promise
I wont ever be jealous
Neither will I ever give u another burden
for I have trully known..
that my presence is a mere annoyance..
Nonetheless..
I will always be happy
cuz I can always recognise u as my friend..
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My obsession with lim qian pink doesnt stop there... My broken heart is simply incurable for the the next 3 month... untill finally, I can cool my self down....
i did create a new poem as a representation of my love to her.... and that poem was included on my newly published malay poetry book , "pagi telah pergi" -ISBN 9789810589332-which can be found in any national or community library in singapore. This poem can be found at page 104...
Lim Qian Pink
(the girl who has nvr failed to enlighten my day)
(the girl who has nvr failed to enlighten my day)
kau tak pernah gagal membuatku tertawa..
tak pernah sekali pun..
setiap patah kata yang terucap..
Bagaikan rayuan bidadari langit ketujuh..
tapi mengapa masih sukar kumengerti hakikat perasaan ini?
orang kata cinta itu berbahaya...
jadi selama ini kucuba mengelakkannya..
tapi sungguh tak kuasa aku manusia..
mahadaya cinta ,maha dahsyatnya..
maka bersemilah..
bunga-bunga kasih yang telah lama berpucuk di hati..
qian pink..
kenalilah kata sandi hati kecilku yang serba malu..
menyatakan cinta yang ebrsembunyi di balik canda-tawamu..
qian pink...
kan kuukirkan janji di atas prasasti hati..
bahawa aku kan setia menunggu..
suatu hari kau sudi menerima cintaku..
andaikata hari itu tak jua datang..
aku rela melepaskanmu..
aku sudah amat bersyukur..
kerna dapat kutatap maya bayangmu
bayang bayang itu..
lapangkan seruang sempit di dada..
lukiskan sekilas senyuman di muka..
dan berikan aku tenaga..
agar aku dapat terus berdiri di alam nyata..
aku sudah amat bersyukur..
kerana akhirnya kutahu..
kemana perginya cintaku, harapanku, jatidiriku..
yang telah lama melarikan diri..
That poems has beens recieveing very good comments from malay poetry book commentator...
Everytime I recall that poem... i cant resist to let my tears to drop... mhh... But I always remember her last sentence to me at that day...
"bayu, you will surely get better girl in the future.... better than me... keep my word my friend..."
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what about now??? hahaha.... I regard her only as my good friend... =) ... well recently I always prefer that way..
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there are still many things to share abt my day rightnow... But I felt damn tired already... I shall continue this story tommorow... =)
#01-05-08# 20.08 am
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