Birthday.. Thank you God - for marcus' trust

this may sound a lil bit gay but I guess dear blog should hear abt this..

The greatest hapiness that i have in 2011 is having Marcus wong to gain his trust back on me..

I had been trying to gain his trust for more than 2 years and for that 2 years I have been failing.. he still thought I was gay, He still freaked out with me..

In those 2 years I had problems with my own life.. (siew ting rejects me, love life prob with eveline and then yuki ) often i doubt myself if i were actually meant to be straight ( not bcz i like guys, but bcz i seems to have lots of problems with girls).. i would eventually put my final bet on asking marcuz out, if he still didnt trust me that meant perhaps i was really meant to gay.. and yeah for that 2 fucking years I had been hurting myself.. literary..


becoz eventually the conclusion was still marcuz was still freaked out of me.. to me it was like God trying to tell me that I meant to be gay.. i was super pissed..

In my eyes as his friend, He is just like an ordinary guy who has a lil more brain.. he is kind and polite .. but the thing that makes me damn happy is not so much abt him...

It is about myself.. in the world of my friendship, i really have a goal on what kind of friends i wanna mix with.. I had luqman , yeohon, mansur, kelvin , zack, etc.. each from different world with unique character.. but these people are themselves.. the dont really share the same thoughts as me...

when i met marcuz 2 years ago.. i was like surpriced.. cuz the first time in my life i was actually talking to a person that thinks like me, believe in the same future as mine..a person that love to use phychology to crack ppl's mind ( although he seems more pro in this field) just like me..


i pledged and i swore i had to befriend with him.. and I still carry that pledge untill now..

and in my 21th birthday.. hi hung up with him and luqman...marcuz seems to hv taken a small step to try to trust me again.. and that small step is actually meant alot for me..

i am very happy now he finally trusts me.. his trust and this brotherhood i shall protect forever with my own blood, yeah.. his trust and this brotherhood worth more than my own life.. at least for now..

thank you god..
and thanks wong for giving me another chance....

Lot of things have happened

days have just spoken for themselves... too much haf happen since I last blog... too much that I could only mention some...

siew ting-
I pledged not to talk to her forever..


yeow hon-
He apologizes to me abt things that make everything wrong, but yeah It is all too late.. now, I have changed, ada has changed and i guess there is no wag we could patch back friendship the way it used to be.

marcus wong-
after 2 years of distrusting me he finally trust me... we hang out like every week eversince my birthday.. haha.. I am damn happy..

yunzhong-
no comments.. I shall just let the tides move...

rayhana and indra-
I really seldom meet them, but yeah.. they r always be in my hearts (as friends) ... winks..

and now... I hv to find job.. damn.. =(

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