my dreams that burns...

My guardian again made so much noise this morning.. My dad owe her S$7563 , and he has not pay it until now.. I get really sick to keep reminding my dad abt that... seriously.. MOST of my friend think I am a rich bastard... if u really think that way ... then think again...


It is true than my family income exceeds S$9000 ... and some more most of my family member live in Indonesia where living cost is way much cheaper compared to Singapore.

It is true than my family own 3 houses.. 2 in the city and one in the town..

It is true than My family has a private company, and I am one on the share holder there...

it is true than My pocket money is 500 bucks.. and that is purely for my pocket money...

These are what u asked me... and what u wanted to know..

you my friends have no idea.. how much my dad owes the bank for the continuity for our company.


Here is some basic view...

Family total assets : approx. $S 690000
Total Company assets: approx. $S 156250

BANK LOAN : approx. $S 320000


u can see from the figure... my family owes bank .... the amount is almost half of the total family's assets.. how could u consider this rich...

WE have money... but we DONT have cash... Our money is either stuck on investment, assets, and even in our custumer who always delay payment...

seriously.. I am not rich... and I hate to be stereotyped as having lots of money if I shit money... =.=...

when i was in secondary school.. i always dream for my future... yeah.. my dream is to be an actor... a professional movie actor.. but due to many circumstances I lost faith on myself..

I act well... but I am not physically attractive.. how could I be an actor.. hahaha... sometimes life is just unfair... they are things that's that cant be change no matter how hard u attempted...

and therefore I am forced to believe that being a movie director is better than an actor.. when I start to like movie directing... My dad made me believe that all these creative business will require lots of fund.. and that's when i direct my thought... I start becoming as money-minded as ever... i begin to like business and until now... I am also the founder of My company.... a company that have not been making significant profit for the past 3 month..

But i always believe in myself.. though due to the creation of our company my dad kept delaying payment to my guardian... lolx... I always support my company no matter wht.. I dont want to ruin my own dream... I wnt to hv $S 60 million on my pocket by the age of 30... god.. please show me the way..

but how am I suppose to proceed, if people around me only know how to tease me of being 'rich' .. even when I tell them i really keen in learning Chinese... whenever I try to talk chines to them they will make fun of it.. even my very best friend.. hhaha... seriously.. I get really pissed of with this situation..
?

for God sake.. I am now 20 this year.. what have I achieve in my life..? it seems nothing significant...

1st. I fall in love many times but never ever had a gf..

2nd. I dont drink, smoke, fight.. even if my friend does... I have my principles..

3rd. I have no much friend.... guess where am I now? I am at the empty corner of engine hall of fame..
typing this blog... and I have free time until 6pm.. all my friends busy as always..

4th. I am not good at studying. I am not close to my classmate at all.. I think it will be just a matter of time that I finally decided to leave tp even before I graduate..

5th. I have a lil bit of weird attitude.. it is easy for me to make friend, but.. very hard for me to keep them..

ah.... there are 1001 facts about me.. that's even if I spend my whole life time mentioning it here on my blog... I still cant finish..

my dear blog... maybe u are the only best friend that I have... listen to me ... always... listen to my story... and never reply me back... even when I decided not to blog anymore.. you are still there.. just waiting for me to come back.. hahah...

I am so down now.. my tears keep wetting my laptop... I hope no one is coming down here to find me here.. that would be embarrassing to see a guy crying when typing to his blog.

whatever it is my dear blog.. I just wonder.. just wonder.. some where on this earth is there a guy who is just like me? yeah.. suffer the same fate as me.. is there anyone my dear blog..?
I just want to know.. really..

It seems like no girls will ever fall in love with me.. a guy like me.. who is just so freaking coward... I didnt even have a gut to express my love to the girl I like.. I didnt even have guts to say how much I miss her.. and how glad I can be to just to see her face , tough she can be quiet to me all the time...

I am not a romeo, nor a cassanova.. I feel like I am just an emo-shit lover... who can only express everything thru my blog... what a loser.. I gonna be 20 years old soon.. and I am still the same person as 5 years ago..

when i am sad people would just walk pass by and say... " cheer up.." "cheer up" I dont really know if that really works... seriously..