endless night..

I am very sick.. headache +high fever+ influenza+ sorethoart ... and yeah my temperature was 39.5 degree celcius yesterday... I went to hospital , The doctor insist on me to take a rest for 5 days but my orgcom attendence is alrd 75% other attendence is already at border line... eventually he gave me 2 days MC... but ...still I gonna miss my orgcom today..天啊我应该做什么。。。


yesterday night I am so bored + sick+ stress... I tried to call yeow hon , my best friend... but he never answer my call.. so sad... think he is a bit busy these days...
then I msg yun zhong... mhh he is busy dong hiss comprog project... I dont want to disturb him.. mhh.. then I called this gal..

well fine... i admit... I like her...
u wanna know who?? nah... its secret for now.. it is not the time yet for me to name her in my dear blog... let us give her a nick name... mhh... marry , sounds good..

i told marry I was in hospital, and just consulted a doctor... once I hear her voice, It seems that my sickness a lil bit healed.. I also Do not knw this strange feeling.. we chat and all taking crap from almost an hour...

my guardian complained... she said " I thought u sick, you cant walk, you cant eat? how come u can talk untill so long like that"... I just keep laughing to myself maybe she doesnt know... "talking to her" can heal me better than those 12 different medication the doctor gave me... lolx...

She sounds more friendly in the phone than in a real live when talking to me.. I donno why... haha..

Yesterday afternoon I msg a girl who really like joses... oh yeah... I forgot to tell you who is joses.. Joses is a guy who can lure any girls he wishes to lure... practically most of girl I know from camp, really bound on him... being as a friend, best friend, and even some one who likes him... all the girls simply would care abt anything else when they meet joses.. even JOVINA... my friend... who claimed to be joses close friend...

so yeah I msg that girl.. her house is just opposite my house I was about to ask her to meet up for u lunch... right under the block.. just as a friend... I dont have any feeling to her... guess what... she cant make it... cuz of who...? yeah... JOSES... she told me earlier... liking JOSES is not something good.. but she just dont understand why she would melt whenever she met him...

i getting really pissed of with him... but to some extent I admire him for being able to lure the ladies.. +.+

and yeah... few hours before I called marry..miue went online... she demanded answer from me... for deleting her and anthony facebook.. she ask me 2 times but I keep changing the topic.. and she asked no more..

she told me she is fine and all.. I am quite glad to hear that ... but I felt guilty for not answering her question.. so I myself asked her.. then suddenly she asked me again...

I told her "sometimes things are better left unknown, isnt it? I just dont want to stress urself"...then she said " its ok, i dont really want to know also" ... I thought she is angry but then she told me she is not angry at all.. when i typed that I actually cried... I just dont want her to know that I actually really love her... to the extend that I dont want her to think to much about me...

I am really stupid ..

I think marry and miue... never even love me...



both marry and miue share one common thing... both of them fall in love with another guy... and yeah... I am just an ugly guy... walking from time to time searching for true love which yet to be found...

I am just really stupid..

at night I laid down on the sofa on the balcony... with my friend william and ken.. they keep telling me how stupid am I ... one urged me to betray anthony and get miue to like me... haha... I immediately shouted at them.. I told them I wuldnt do that...i just want miue to be happy.. even if it is with anthony...maybe miue is just a girl in this spinning world... but in my eyes.. she is just like a world to me..

William: how the hell you know miue is happy with anthony?
Me : I dont really know, but I believe on it... since she really love him...
William: You are so stupid..

on my heart... I actually agreed with william... haiz.. I didt know what should I say...

I chated with both for them till 2 am.. when I actually fall asleep on the balcony... and they left me there.. mhh..