Why now?

I am staring at beautiful blue sky in the horizon. Perhaps it is has blue as my friendship with yeow hon. I am really asking myself. Ego? Is it worth it? Man has pride yes they are, but is it worth it? a simple "sorry" sometime will do much better than chains of friendly conversation, as a gesture of apology. But is it worth it?

yeow hon is undeniably my best friend. However recently It is the time of dark ages beween us. We can like, quarrel four times in a day, for just something as simple as, "why did u end the conversation, I am talking to you"-"well indrani is calling me, and siew ting texted me too, I ans for a while ,can!", to something like, "I swear I gonna punch ur face, you are so bloody fucking irritating"-" punch la".

Today I have not eaten yet. I told my freind, I was lazy to eat alone and wht so ever. But actually I wanted to eat with yeow hon and ada together . When I went to cent room, I knocked the door for I didnt have the matrix card assess . Yeow hon was eating while playing com, he looked at me, and turn back.. he didn't bother to open the door. Ada opened the door. She was initially sleeping at the couch but was awaken by me knocking at the door. So was it YH fault. Nah. It wasnt. It was not my fault either. Both of us are not in good term.

When I went in to the club. I was staring at yeow hon, and felt like asking him to eat tgt.. But its OK. He didnt even face me at all though the fact that my eyes is less than a meter from him. He was still angry. He was still pissed of. And I were still pissed of with him too.

In the past to just few month ago, I was the type of guy who hack care abt money. I would treat my friend. took taxi real often. and what so ever. But these days I have changed. Ever since my family undergoes a mini financial problem few month ago. My attitude towards money does change. and that is felt so tremendously by my closest friend yeow hon. He is recently became so offended that it seems that I have less trust on me. Maybe, he is right. In fact I became so stingy to anyone when it comes abt money recently.

when I was sitting down in the couch few moments ago, browsed thru some of the past photo in my handphone. Some of those are photos of ada and yeow hon. I didnt realize that my tears start dripping.







what in entire past one year has changed so much on either me or him. It is only abt why we quarrel currently, But it is about why do we often not in good term recently. He said, I am annoying!. Well I have been annoying for the past 1.5 years to him, but why now then a became a prob. dont you know that the first day I know yeow hon, I called him and chatted with him on the phone for 4 hours!!.

yeow hon. He does not say " sorry" if he feels he is right, even though he maybe wrong. He has been like that for the past a year and half too. But why only now, does It matter?

there must be something different in me, and in him, recently. I dont knw wht. and I dont think he knows for his side too.

few moments ago, when yun zhong , indrani and all came to cent, I dont talk much to them. Yun zhong asked me why am I so quiet. But I cant tell the truth on the spot, people who are not supposed to hear that were present. I merely answered, " I'm hungry". well despite the fact that I have not eaten for one and half day, my hunger somehow did not matter much this time. I just kept thinking abt yeow hon and ada all a while.

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