few days ago I asked my good friend ,christopher, regarding which one he thought is better... learning technical skill or business skill of both the same fields...?
chris = teachnical skill
me= why? (i expected an intelligent ans..)
chris= because I dont like business stuff, and my mom say I am not good at business..
me= plz give me a more intelligent answer that can be accepted by me...
chris = for what?
me = I am a lil confused weather I should tranfer from media and communication tech course to media and communication management course... I want to know which course that will thought me a skill more demanded in the future...
chris = I dont know... don ask me... thats ur future... your life.... your decision....
me= why the hell u suddenly act jus like alex...!!
chris = no offence... but it's true.... u must make ur own decision...
I was really pissed off and left him alone for a moment... I kept asking why nowadays christopher seemed to start acting like alex.. or perhaps that's just because of my over sensitiveness...duh.... I really didnt know...
recently I have so many friend.... I cant have a day of loniness.. I am very glad abt that... but somehow when I hang out with them... I feel there is amiss... mhh... Perhaps that missing 'thing' is alexander... I just feel bad knowing he is no longer be around... no longer he regards me as his friend, unlike last time... I just cant resist to halt a grieve... it seems to have stucked on my throat...
few moments ago... I saw alexander msn account was online.... It seemed he was just unblock my msn... I was excited for a moment.. it seemed god hath ans my prayer...
I asked myself what to do next...
me= I am really confused what to do... should i apologise...
myself = what are u going to fucking apologise for?
me= I dont know...
myself= exactly, now just shut up... since there is nothing impt to say... and i tell u what... he just fucking doesnt care abt u... every word u say... is a liability to him... bare in mind... he has changed.... he is no longer the alexander u knew last year... and the way he talked barely represents his character.. he just couldnt resist saying vulgarities to u.... not at all... he just doesnt respect u at all...
me= hey... why are u provoking me here ha....!! this is my life... my prob... my solution... so fuck off...
myself= hw can u say that... I am you... u are me... use ur brain....!!
me=just ... just.... shut up... and leave me alone!!
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for a moment i thought I was undergoing a real mental disorder due to hyperexcitement and hyperconfusion... but later on I realised... that was just an over-depressed respons due to the lack of self esteem...
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